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To The Souls Who Feel Too Deeply

There are some souls who just feel deeper than others. Some souls who just take everything in. To the ones who don't drink up emotions, take mental photographs of every little thing, or feel like they're in a movie every time an evoking song comes on; they tend to think it's dramatic. To really look at your life like it's a novel with plots and conflicts and magic-it's like living in a false reality;or so some think. To those souls who do feel like an emotional sponge, I would tell them to consider themselves blessed. Being one of those souls, I've often understood the term "tortured artist". To be so deeply engaged in everything and have heightened senses all the time is something most don't understand-but it's how things are created. It's how we get inspiration, desire, and it's how we love. It's the tiny moments that let us know we are alive-and those who feel deeper get to feel it more often. It's how those paintings in those galleries fill the walls with mystery and color. It's how those songs on the radio take you away. It's how you watch a movie and get sucked into its wonder, like it's your own life. It's the feeling of a warm sunset through all the tiny hairs on your arms. All the kisses in the driveway at midnight after long talks. That drive down the road at 19 years old with mom and dad in the rear view and that lump down in your throat. Dances in the dark kitchen in wool socks after a home cooked dinner and a couple glasses of wine. It's the snow falling slowly and quietly outside the window while everyone gathers in a pile of pillows to watch that old movie. Or the curls that surround the little face of a baby who just smiled right at you. It's that job you really loved but just couldn't work out and you were left to wonder what you're meant to do here on Earth. To feel the mountain air, crisp on your eyelashes when you are driving through them with nothing else to do. Running barefoot in wet grass with ice cold feet, or dancing in heavy rain drops and never feeling more awake. Or driving at 2 am with your best friends, singing as loud as your lungs will let you to all those embarrassing old songs. It's that big fight at 2 a.m. when you wonder how anything could ever be okay again. The big balloon and cake fest in the living room you woke up to on your 10th birthday. Hugging your mom and smelling the familiar linger of home and being safe. It's that one song that always takes you back to being 17 and in love. Or those memories of the friends who moved away and never really looked back for you. Sometimes it's the longing to make a difference, just knowing you were created to impact something. It's saying "I love you" for the first time and really meaning it. Laying down in your bed alone the first night in your new apartment and having that home sick knot in your stomach. It's the miles on the interstate in the freezing darkness just to keep that long distance relationship alive regardless. The feeling of failing at something you just knew that you were destined to do. Maybe letting go of someone who meant everything to you, and the warm tears that come along with that. It's the first bite of that meal you'd been waiting hours for and it's perfect. It's looking into the eyes of someone who loves you and knowing that it's going to be okay. The apology that you practiced in the car the whole way over and you still said it wrong. Maybe the full peace that comes when you are with the people who mean the most to you in this world and you know that they're more than enough. The quiet time before the sun comes up and everyone's still curled under their covers. It's seeing the warm ocean with your own two eyes and trying to comprehend its massiveness. The drifting of two friends who found new paths, but always remember the past. It's those chill bumps on your arms and legs when you walk across that stage for a degree you've worked yourself to the bone for. That first kiss that takes your breath away and leaves you speechless. Or the break up that left you with that deep, breathless cry on the floor because you lost something you don't know if you'll ever find again. It's watching your bride walk down the aisle in awe. Or being that bride, in that moment, like no one else is watching you but him. Maybe it's the first time your fingers wrapped around that steering wheel and you had a long drink of freedom. It's being with someone who makes you feel young-young enough to laugh at anything, and dance anywhere. It's being alive. It's those moments that cause us to not even be able to comprehend how amazing this life is. We are incapable of understanding just how deeply we can feel. So to those souls who feel "too" deeply--you are the ones that are lucky. We are the ones that are lucky.